A simple, magic way to conjure love

This past Friday morning, I was rushing around the house getting ready for work. I was doing all the things I needed to do, my mind several steps ahead of where I was, trying to make it out of the door on time.

I walked into my bedroom where my dog, Ursula, was still curled up on the bed, since she likes to sleep in. The moment she saw me, she instantly rolled onto her back and presented her belly for morning rubs. She flopped over so dramatically and enthusiastically that I had no choice but to stop everything and give this girl the belly rubs she was clearly requesting. It was as though she had fallen backward and trusted that I would catch her with love. And I realized afterward that this tiny moment completely changed my morning. The best part of my morning wasn’t anything I had planned, it was this unexpected diversion. And Ursula reaching out for love created more love.

That got me thinking. What if reaching out to receive love is part of how love gets generated? So I decided to carry that question with me for the rest of the day and do a bit of research.

Would you not rub this belly?

Later, I stopped at a little bento box shop for lunch. My plan was simple: grab something quickly and head back out. I wanted a tuna onigiri, but they were sold out. One of the staff members asked if there was something I wanted that wasn’t available. I noticed my default response was wanting to say that I would simply choose from what’s there, without anyone having to worry about it.

But then I thought, “why not accept the care that's being offered?” So I said yes and could they please make me exactly what I wanted in the back? And from where I waited, the staff member brought everything over to me when it was ready (an onigiri so fresh it's warm in my hands, can you imagine?!), helped me pay from my seat, and just generally made the experience thoughtful and welcoming. What stuck with me afterward was how much richer the interaction of purchasing my lunch became because I had accepted the offer of care. Again, more love was created because I was willing to accept it.

Roo, the cat

Later that day, I stopped at Dollarama. There was a long line and only one cashier working. I watched them moving person to person, asking the same questions: “Do you need a bag? Would you like your receipt?” As I approached the till, I found myself thinking that I want to connect with this person somehow. But everything felt rushed and there wasn’t time for a meaningful conversation. All I could think to do was give a big, genuine smile. And you know what? They returned one right back to me. It sounds silly, but for a brief moment it felt like we were smiling into each other’s souls. Nothing slowed down, the line kept moving but there was a micro-uplift ripple effect generated in that moment (that’s a new technical term, by the way). When I smile at people, which I love to do, I am usually aware of what I’m giving. But now I’m seeing that a smile isn’t only an offering, it’s also a request or an invitation. And when someone smiles back, something gets created between us, which I’ll sum up as love for the purposes of this short article.

Finally, on my bike ride home, I stopped to record some notes about all of this. As I sat there thinking about receiving love, a very gregarious little calico cat trotted directly toward me and began rubbing against my legs and asking for pets. We shared a tiny magical moment together. Even simply holding this question in my mind seemed to be inviting these little love encounters into my life!

So what I’m really sitting with this week is:

How does being open to receiving love actually generate more love in the world? 

And how might being open to receiving love be one of the most generous things I can do?

The inspiration I want to leave you with this week is simple. Notice where love is trying to find you. Notice where support, care, kindness, generosity, or affection are already being offered and see what happens if you allow yourself to receive it. And if you can't find it, ask for it because

1) you deserve it and

2) the world needs it.

Every act of receiving allows love to continue moving. It creates more of it and amplifies it.

I’d love your thoughts on the matter:

When is a time you reached out for love and what was reflected back?